Nothing to Lose

Yes, I am nervous…

But, I also feel excited.

Tomorrow…yes tomorrow…

Only this one step that can make me crazy all the times.

Yes, once I succeed in this step…

My dream will truly come true, insyaallah!

 

Aaargh! I do not know what to do…

They say I should be relax, calm, focus, concise, and honest with full of passion.

But, sometimes it is still hard for me to speak that fluent.

Ya Rabb, please make me speak fluently and clearly for tomorrow…

 

Huft,

Ok, let’s make a prediction.

I will pass that step successfully…

My friend also passed it.

We go together to the land of dreams.

I will put my forehead on the ground, say a million of thanks to Allah The Mighty.

Then, I step my feet on it and say, “Lailaha ilallah…”

I feel the weather, I breathe the air… “Subhanallah!”

And I will up date my status, “There is nothing impossible in Allah’s hands. We just need to believe in His Arithmetic!”

 

Ow, how beautiful that imagination is…

Alright, now it’s the time for me to…

face it, fight it, bismillah…

Dear My Future

Dear My Future,

Hi, this is still me, but in present
I believe you are still fine and great in this future.
Have you achieved your dreams?
I can convince you have.

“It’s not easy to be me.”

Let me predict that you have been through many steps and all processes that make you more mature. Don’t forget to say alhamdulillah no matter what have happened in your life. Keep your head down to HIM. Nothing to worship except Allah.

Did you still remember?
Once you said to yourself that believing on our own dreams is not that easy. You tried to force yourself to build your braveness and believe on what you want to achieve. You always remind yourself to not be selfish because Allah doesn’t like the way you think that you are the best one upon all the world creatures.
Yes, you, then, believe anything can happen because nothing is impossible in Allah’s eyes.

I am still in the present. I hope your are now still remember the mistakes I did in this time. Therefore, now you are the expert one in taking good sides for every single thing happening in your life.

Look at you now!
You are smiling…
I love the way you can smile happily.
Allah must be loving you very much.

You’ve already made your parents happy…
But, you realize even you can buy the whole world, you will never be able to repay what your parents have given to you.

…My future, this is me in the present.
I hope you are feeling well in the future.
Don’t forget that Allah is always watching over us in every single heartbeat we (still) have now.

P.S : There is no single random thing happens in this life, Allah has always have many plans for us… Just believe that!

 

For me in the present: Bismillah…you just need to do the things as best as you can and let the decision to Allah… Now, you hold two possibilitie: succeed or fail! But you have to believe either one of them will be the best because Allah always fullfil what you need…

 

Ya ‘aliim…give me that chance to step these feet to a land of knowledge…!

Focus

“If you focus, you can burn the world.”

Let me try to focus on several things…

1. Finish my thesis as soon as possible. I just want to graduate immediately.

2. Get a scholarship for short course in the US. Ya Rabb, can you let me to get that opportunity? I beg you for sure.

3. Write a novel. My last year resolution and I want make it true this year.

4. Find a job.

5. Prepare to be accepted in “Indonesia Mengajar.” I do want to dedicate my life for people.

Maybe those five things are enough. Yeah, just trying to make them real…

Bismillah…

 

OnLy take one more step

Akhirnya kemaren aku minta ijin ke Ibu-Bapak tentang rencanaku buat ikut Heritage Camp (14-27 Juli 2009) nanti di Semarang (yang bakal lanjut di komplek Borobudur). Alhamdulillah diijinin (yay!).
Sempet bingung juga ngejelasinnya

Two years ago…

“Mbak doain q yawh q ngerjainx lncar n lulus seleksi…mkasih…”
hmmm…pagi2 Lala udah sms aq. Hari ini dia ikut ujian SNMPTN dan ya seperti tiga hari yang lalu dia juga sms aku nanya2 tentang gmn bisa lulus ujian seleksi masuk PTN (tahun 2007 lalu namanya SPMB).
Lala sendiri itu tetanggaku dan tahun ini dia baru aja lulus SMA. Huff…jadi mengingatkanku akan masa lalu (halah! hehe.)